Motivational Speaker Jim Rohn has been widely quoted as saying you’re an average of the five people you spend most time with.
At this unique time in history that’s an interesting thought! Our top five people for the last year probably looks a bit different to years gone by! According to this theory I’ve probably turned into something nearing a 1950’s housewife with a Monster Truck obsession.
Let’s track back to times gone by. I want you to really consider who you spend the most time with. It’s probably a mixture of family, work colleagues and friends. The first, you’re probably stuck with, the second is harder to choose but if the business is large enough you can at least make friends with certain people. The third is, and should be entirely up to you - no excuses here.
So who are your top 5? Write them down. What type of personality do they have? Are they positive and uplifting or do they hoover up your mood the minute you see a call or message from them? These conscious and unconscious cues will be impacting your general wellbeing and the way you go onto impact those around you, whether you recognise it or not.
Over the years, I’ve made a mental note not to let myself get involved with people who bring me down. It’s tough though right. There are times, especially in work where you can’t simply walk away because of the way someone’s acting. You can however choose to fill your spare time with interactions with people you enjoy spending time with, who put a smile on your face and bring good energy. It’s not actually that hard, I just don’t think most of us give it that level of thought.
I heard a great phrase recently from the Disruptive Entrepreneur, Rob Moore. It’s also one of my wife’s favourite sayings! It resonated so much with me that I’ve found myself saying it over and over again when I notice someone picking holes in someone else or purposely being obtuse or worse, rude. Hurt People, Hurt People.
More often than not, when you peel back the layers of a person who is trolling someone online or being rude to someone in the street, its because they are hurting. We’ve all experienced this. You’ve had no sleep, you’re really stressed and on the way into work someone pulls out in front of you – you curse and beep the horn. Its still a version of Hurt People, Hurt People.
If we want to be our best selves, then we need to and must create an environment where we surround ourselves by people we respect, who energise us and when we do bump into people that bring us down, we recognise it, let it wash over us and find someone more positive to talk to a soon as we can.
I know things are tough right now and this is harder than it’s ever been. That’s why its so important to talk. Make a list of 5 people who bring a smile to your face. When you’re next feeling low or like someone popped your bubble, reach out to one of them and see how you feel after.